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So here I am, washing the floor. I don't see why my mom had to scream at me and force me to clean up. I was just ironing my shirt. I love doing laundry. It brings such pleasure. There is no job I'd rather do than laundry. Taking dirty clothes stained with muck, blood, and pasta sauce...my grandma makes the best pasta in the world. It has oregano, parsely, leek, and tomato. Tomatoes are interesting vegetables. Are they vegetables or fruits? They are tough on the outside but squishy inside. I love squishy things. Up in my room I have many stuffed animals. I like hugging my bears, koalas, dolphins and dinosaurs. I still remember when my dad gave me the dinosaur. It was all wrapped up and I ripped the paper off. He dropped it off one night on my bed while I was asleep. I love sleeping. My method of sleeping is very strange. I just lay down and close my eyes. What is my eye color? I don't remember. There are many things I can't remember. I forget easily. The other day I forgot to pick up my girlfriend for a date. I dislike my girlfriend. Why am I going out with her? I do remember asking her out. Her hair was so pretty that day. I love hair. Hair can say so much about a person. I can't say which type I like more: blond, brunette, long, short, straight or curly. I admire curly things. How they stay together is a mystery. DNA is curly. It spins around and reproduces itself very easily. That reproduction is good. There is one bad type of reproduction. Cancer cells shouldn't reproduce. My grandfather had cancer. My mom tells me they shot rays at him everyday. I imagine him in an old star trek movie. "Beam me up Scottie." I have a friend named Scottie. I see him everyday and twice on Sunday. Sunday is a fun day for me. We spend all day doing nothing and at night we go to church. Our church is really interesting. The priest gives a long sermon and always tells us what we shouldn't do. Every Sunday the list gets bigger and bigger. We keep lists in my house. They tell us what we need to buy at the grocery store and pharmacy. Our family visits the pharmacist often. My mom says we are hypo-something. Something about being sick all the time. I'm feeling sick right now. I'm sick of having to clean this mess. It wasn't my fault, but getting back... The pharmacy is close to my house. My mom says I have to go in a little while. She's making a list of all the stuff we need, stomach pills, headache pills, and even pills that the Church doesn't want us to buy. Maybe if the priest at our church wasn't so conservative. That's the only reason I dislike Sundays. Sundays are the best days. I spend all day with Scottie. We are both tan from soaking in the sun's rays. My mom says we shouldn't spend all that time in the sun or we'll get skin cancer. My grandfather is now in remission. He tells me he has visualized rabbits to get better. Rabbits reproduce very quickly. Rabbit fur is fun. I'd like it more if it were curly. Like a poodle. My girlfriend has a poodle. What's it's name? Oh, I don't know-some really stupid name. Something to do with it's eye color. All it ever does is sleep. It just lays on it's bed all day. Sometimes I wish a big animal would eat the stupid mutt. A dinosaur could easily devour it. Then perhaps we could have him stuffed. Unfortunately real stuffed animals are hard. You can't squish them. The poodle has very strange tastes. It likes eating fruits and vegetables. Maybe what we should do is remove the tomatoes from his diet. Perhaps that will kill him. Or we can poison his salads. That's it! I'll get my grandmother to make some of her pasta. Then I'll put rat poison in it. What if she eats it? Oh well it's not like I love her that much. She doesn't really like what I like. She wouldn't even help me with the laundry, which is why I'm here now washing the floor.